HG discovers Fan fic
by warriorhungergames
Summary: The hunger games characters write and comment fanfictions about themselves. (Warning extremely funny. We are not liable for any injuries cause by laughing too hard)
1. Chapter 1

"Katniss, Katniss look at this cool website I found" screams Peeta.

"What?" asks Katniss

"It's called fan fiction you can write about us and so can other people" says Peeta excitedly.

"Okay Peeta have fun" says Katniss

"I will" says Peeta.

/bFoxface/b : /bFoxface/b

/bClove/b : /b knives r everything/b

/bPeeta/b : /bBread man/b

/bGale/b : /bSnare god/b

/bKatniss/b : /bFire jay/b

/bPrim/b : /bGale sucks/b

/bCato/b : /bMai sword/b

/bDelly/b : /bEverlark 4 Eva/b

/bSeneca/b : /bI like your beard/b

/bCinna/b : /bset fire to the girl/b

/bHaymitch/b : /bWine!/b

/bFinnick/b : /bTell me a secret/b

/bRue/b : /bSong Rue/b

/bThresh/b : /bI will rock you/b

/bJohanna/b : /baxe chick2/b

/bGlimmer/b : /bsparkles/b

/bAnnie/b : /bfluffy fishy/b

/bMarvel/b : /bSave me from the arrow/b

/bRory/b : /bmini rebel/b

/bEffie/b : /bthat is mahogany/b


	2. Chapter 2

/bAuthor/b: Gale sucks

/bTitle/b: Why I like Peeta better than Gale

/brated/b: T

/bGenre/b: there isn't one

These are the reasons my sister should be with Peeta and not fail (Gale).

1.)Peeta didn't fucking blow me up

2.) Peeta's story of how he fell in love with Katniss is sweet

3.) Gale is kind of Gay

4.) I 'm dating Rory and if Gale dates Katniss I can't keep dating him

5.) Peeta's bread is better than Gale's dead squirrels.

6.)Peeta isn't a girl name

/bFire jay/b: you're dating Rory?

/bSnare god/b: you're a liar dead my squirrel's rock

/bknives r everything/b: Ha u didn't deny being gay

/bSnare god/b: because I think Harry is so sexy but it doesn't matter because Katniss is mine.

/bBread man/b: No she's not, she's mine I can prove it, Katniss where were you today during noon till twelve thirty

/bFire jay/b: getting your wedding ring

/bSnare god/b: -_-

/bSong Rue/b: Katniss I have a song for u THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE, SHE'S WALKING ON FIRE

/bFluffy fishy/b: what do you get when you cross the boy with the bread and the girl on fire? Toast!

/bEverlark 4 Eva/b: Toast, lol, there kid's nick name shall be toast

/bFire jay/b: No, if you call them that I will shoot you with my arrows but I won't kill you. I will shoot your leg and when you can't move I will release Clove on your ass.

/bKnives r everything/b: Yay I get to kill someone =D

/bEverlark 4 Eva/b: *scoots away from computer*

/bBread man/b: Clove if you kill Delly without Katniss saying so I WILL RELEASE THRESH ON YOU!

/bKnives r everything/b: *lips quivers in fear*

/bGale sucks/b: I thought of number seven, Gale can't scare Clove but Peeta makes her tremble in fear


	3. Chapter 3

/bTitle/b: How the games should have been

/bAuthor/b: song Rue

/brated/b: T

/bSummary/b: How my games should have gone.

/bGenre/b: Friendship and action

My games should go like this. I fucking win with Katniss. Why you ask, because she's the most awesome person ever. Clove dies by me kicking her until her lungs clasp. Marvel dies by me using as a trampoline to jump on Glimmer who I use as a trampoline I use to jump on Marvel. Cato gets eaten by squirrels. Foxface and other nameless tributes shall die by being eaten by bunnies. Thresh and Peeta since we're friends you two get in a rock fight and the winner will get their throat slit by yours truly. And Katniss and I will win, bitches.

/bI set fire to the girl/b: did you write this by yourself?

/bSong Rue/b: Seneca helped with the deaths besides Thresh's and or Peeta's, oh and Marvel's and Glimmer's, and Clove.

/bFire Jay/b: Thnx 4 calling me the most awesome person ever. But this was twisted.

/bSong Rue/b: Hey Seneca said it was cool

/bFoxface/b: Bunnies, really, are you serious, really. My demise is being eaten by bunnies, you know how embarrassing that they would write death by bunnies on my death record.

/bGuest/b: It's really embarrassing, I'm a fallen tribute and that was my death.

/bKnives r everything/b: WTF, what did I do to you to be kicked to death?

/bSong Rue/b: You tried to kill Katniss the most fucking awesome person I know. So you must die.

/bBread man/b: Rock fight then you slit my throat? I thought we were friends.

/bSong Rue/b: Would you rather be eaten by bunnies?*evil face*

/bBread man/b: *gulp*I'm good

/bI will rock you/b:Who says you would even win lover boy? I have special rock skills


	4. Chapter 4

Title: The best day of my life.

/bAuthor/b: Bread man

/bSummary/b: The best day that will happen to me, my wedding day, when I marry Katniss.

/bGenre/b: Romance

/bRating/b: T

I watch as Katniss walks down the aisle. She is as beautiful as a goddess. When she looks at me I melt. I keep thinking what I always think, how did I get such a perfect girl to love me? She gets to the altar. We say our I do's and we kiss. I feel fireworks as I kiss her. I pull away.

"I love you Mrs. Mellark" I say. I smirk at her new name.

"I love you too" she says.

/bFire Jay/b: *sniffle*that was beautiful Peeta, I wuv you

/bSnare god/b: Change her name to Hawthorne in the story and write the best day of my life because she's mine.

/bEverlark 4 Eva/b: Shut up Gale, that was so beautiful Peeta, Everlark Yay!

/bBread man/b: I thought of this story after I proposed (she's mine Gale, so suck it). I love u 2 Katniss.

/bGale sucks/b: EVERLARK, EVERLARK, EVERLARK!

/bSong Rue/b: EVERLARK!

/bSnare god/b: Everthorne?

/bMai sword and mini rebel/b: Bro give it up while you still have some pride.

/bSparkles/b: o me gush Catoe you commented wike me; we hive so mooch in cumon.

/bsave me form the arrow/b: translation: Oh my gosh Cato you commented like me; we have so much in common

/bKnives r everything/b: Glimmer learn to fucking spell and can you read what Peeta wrote? And if u can what is his story about?

/bSparkles/b: I cans spull and weed. It's about hims gwoing to haevan with Catpiss. And maybe her funnully saying I wuv u

/bFire Jay/b: Did u just call me Catpiss? And learn grammar and spelling and how to fucking read. How did you shoot a bow without shooting yourself?!

/bsave me from the arrow/b: Translation to Glimmer's comment: I can spell and read. It's about him going to heaven with Katniss. (But I think she wrote Catpiss on purpose). And maybe her finally saying I love you.

/bWine!/b: dfjksfopifoijfkjfjkfdhfhjsfdsdlhk

/bFire jay/b: Who gave Haymitch a computer?

/bGale sucks/b: He got to my laptop as I took a pee.

/bSnare god/b: TMI

/bBread man/b: Glimmer she has already told me she loves me and my story isn't about me dying. It's about my wedding day.

/bSparkles/b: Oh, I pidn't knarf thut

/b save me from the arrow/b: Translation: I didn't know that.

/bKnives r everything/b: She doesn't know anything and I weirdly agree with Katniss. How did u shoot a bow without shooting yourself? But Catpiss was funny shit.

/bSparkles/b: Thanks

/bsave me from the arrow/b: Holy crap did she spell something right?

/bI like your beard/b: It's the end of the world *sarcastic voice*

/bSparkles/b: Prum hurped me

/bGale sucks/b: translation: Prim helped me. And if you thought it was humped comment a smiley face.

/bEveryone/b:

/bGale sucks/b: Ha, Ha, Ha

A/N The /b was supposed to be bold but it wasn't the right control so sorry


	5. Chapter 5

/bAuthor/b: Fire Jay

/bTitle/b: A hunt with pa

/bRating/b: K

/bSummary/b: A hunting trip I took with my father.

/bGenre/b: Family

I am woken by my father's deep voice" Katniss wake up" he says" time to go." I get up and braid my hair and get dressed. I grab the game bag and I head down stairs. "We must hurry Katniss" says my father" we are in a race with the sun and it has the lead." We run and get to the fence. I slip under the loose wire and retrieve my father's bow. I string it and then grab the quiver of arrows. I hear a bird. I aim at it but my father stops me form taking the shot. "They have not meat there song birds" he says "listen." He sings.

Are you coming to the hanging tree? Where they say the strung up a man who murdered three. Oh strange things did happen here how stranger would it be if we met up at midnight at the hanging tree?

The mocking jays repeat the melody. "I've never heard that song papa" I say.

"Because it illegal" he says.

"But it's just a song papa" I say

"Katniss songs can be as dangerous as that bow in your hand" he says "what is in these woods?"

"Weapons, song birds, food" I say.

"And the most dangerous thing?" he asks

"Freedom" I say "in the wood there's no such thing as the games, as the capitol, in the woods we're free papa."

"That's right" he says then he sighs" I wish that we could be free in the district."

"I do too dad" I say.

/bBread man/b: And now we r free, your dad would be proud of u Katniss.

/bFire jay/b: I know. I truly miss him.

/bGale sucks/b: Katniss that was a nice story *sniffle* I miss daddy.

/bFluffy fishy/b: Aw it's okay Prim HAIRY BLOW FISH he's in a better place.

/btell me a secret/b: Hairy blow fish?

/bFluffy fishy/b: I saw one SHIRTLESS PEETA! in the window.

/bFire jay/b: did u see a hairy blow fish or a shirtless Peeta in the window?

/bFluffy fishy/b: Hairy blow fish in my window SHIRTLESS PEETA is in my dreams. *blush*

/btell me a secret/b: Annie r u kidding? Please say you're kidding about Peeta.

/bFluffy fishy/b: Sorry Glimmer got my SEA BISCUIT laptop and Prim helped her spell JUMPING SEA HORSE the words.

/bSparkles/b: Catpiss whut is your stury abut?

/bsave me form the arrow/b: translation: Katniss (I seriously don't know if she does Catpiss on purpose) what is your story about?

/bFire jay/b: It's about me and my father going hunting.

/bknives r everything/b: Learn to fucking spell and how to read or I'll take away your makeup.

/bSparkles/b: I cun spall, I jest chuse not 2

/bsave me form the arrow/b: Translation: I ca-

/bKnives r everything/b: Marvel if u help her you will have to change your name to save me from the knives. *death glare*

/bsave me form the arrow/b: *scoot**scoot*

/bcoal mining hunter guy/b: Katniss my dear I'm happy that you have freed us and I love u and I'm proud 2 b your father. I'm proud of u 2 Prim. You're like your mother but u have an even kinder heart. And nice story Katniss

/bGale sucks and Fire jay/b: Daddy!

/bBread man/b: Mr. Everdeen, remember me, I'm the baker's son oh and I'm engaged 2 your daughter.

/bcoal mining hunter guy/b: Peeta? Oh, I knew you had an eye 4 Katniss.

/bSnare god/b: Wait I love your daughter 2 and I blew up the other.

/bcoal mining hunter guy/b: WHAT! YOU KILLED MY DAUGHTER! I AM GOING TO HUNT YOU DOWN AN-

/bCoalmining hunter guy has been banned from making a threat on this site, have a nice day/b

/beveryone/b: We will!


	6. Chapter 6

/bAuthor/b: Sparkles (translations by save me from the arrow)

/bTitle/b: Cateo is mune (Cato is mine)

/b Summary/b Rued the tiutle (Read the title)

/bRating/b: what's a rating

/b Genre/b: none

Cateo is mune (Cato is mine). YOU cen't hurve him (You can't have him). Suck it CLOave and Catpiss (suck it Clove and Katniss (still don't know if she does Catpiss on purpose)). Marvel has read mu the fun fanction were you gurt him and Kurss him and murry him well you cen't cause' he's mife (Marvel has read me the fan fiction where you get him and kiss him and marry him, well you can't because he's mine).

/bMai sword/b: I'm not yours, I'm Clove's and learn to spell.

/bFire jay:* smack forehead* Glimmer u r the biggest idiot in the world. If u weren't blonde I would just lose it because u would have no excuse 4 your education or lack thereof.

Bread Man and Gale sucks: Hey! We're both very smart!

/bknives r everything/b: If u r going to hit on my boyfriend at least spell his name right and Marvel I thought u weren't going to help her anymore and u read them to her, really. Glimmer I would knock out your brains if u had any.

/bsave me from the knife/b: I just pity her so I help her; she's like a lost puppy.

/bknives r everything/b: Marvel in a way u called her a bitch, because bitches r girl dogs

/bSparkles/b: Marvle did u cull mu a bich?

/bGale sucks/b: translation: Marvel did u just call me a bitch?

/bsave me from the knife/b: No Glim, Clove twisted my words around. But yea bitch.

/bSparkles/b: =0


	7. Chapter 7

/bAuthor/b: Knives r everything

/btitle/b: the other star crossed lovers.

/bSummary/b: there was more than one pair star crossed lovers here are their story.

/bRating/b: T

/bGenre/b: Romance

You all think that there were just the star crossed lovers of district twelve but there was another pair, the star crossed lovers of district two. Cato and I met when we were five and seven. We were both weak but we still were truly strong. As we got older, we got closer. I started to date him two years before I entered the arena. My token was a diamond ring. He gave it to me a week before we started our fight to the death. I thought I could just go home and marry him but of course he volunteered. When they said two could win I jumped into his arms and kissed him thinking we could have our happy ending. But when I was about to die I screamed for him because I wanted to die in my lover's arms. He told me to hold on but I couldn't fight any longer. And when he was shot he didn't say please he said Clove. We loved each other more than we wanted the honor of winning.

/bFire jay/b:*mouth hangs open* Clove that was…

/bMai sword/b: I love u Clove

/bSparkles/b: I kissed your fiancée

/bKnives r everything/b: GLIMMER U R DEAD! U HAVE 3 SECONDS TO RUN LIKE HELL! 1…..2…3 I'M COMING BITCH!

/bsave me from the knife/b: Glimmer isn't moving. She's dead. Shit how am I going to tell Gloss?

/b knives r everything/b: this is how. Uh Gloss u know how Glimmer's slut well someone killed her because she kissed their fiancée. So yeah she's gone.

/bsave me from the knife/b: Thanks it worked.

/bWine!/b: Yay sheee's goaf shuuts all eround

/bFire Jay/b: Translation: Yay she's gone, shots all around. How did Glimmer know how to spell that sentence right?

/bsave me from the knife/b: Because she's written it before. She was a whore.

/bknives r everything/b: True that

Everyone else:…..Awkward


	8. Chapter 8

/bTitle/b: Why Everlark?

/bAuthor/b:Everlark 4 Eva and Fire jay

/bSummary/b: Why is Katniss and Peeta's ship is called Everlark.

/bRated/b: T

It all started one day when I told Delly I had started to date Peeta. She was so happy for us. One day we were hanging out just me, her, Madge and Peeta. So then Madge asked what our ship name is. Then…

I said "Peeniss." Katniss and Peeta both freaked out and shouted.

"NO!" I was kinda holding back a laugh.

"Okay then Katpee" Madge said. Katniss then looked like she could kill Madge.

"No" says Katniss sternly.

"Wait how about our last names" says Peeta. Then it hit me like a lightning bolt.

"Everlark" I say.

"Good it's not inappropriate" says Peeta.

"Not embarrassing" says Katniss "fine then Everlark."

"Everlark, yay" I say.

/bKnives r everything/b:WTF?

/bMai sword/b: Ha, ha, ha, ha. Peeniss. The holiest of craps. I love how sad that is. Oh and Katpee. Just wow.

/bsnare god/b: I'mma call you Peeniss until you break it off. Kay.

/bBread man/b: Dammit Gale you do that forget Katniss shooting you I'll shove your stupid snares up your-

/bBread man has be taken off temporally for threatening other users/b

/bFire Jay/b: I never knew Peeta had that kind of anger. -_- Oh and Gale don't call us that, plus you would just be shipping us.

/bSparkles from the beyond/b: I'm back and the devil made me smart.

/bKnives are everything/b: DAMMIT! I'LL KILL YOU AGAIN IF I HAVE TO! CRAP YOU CAN'T KILL SOMEONE WHO'S ALREADY DEAD! DAMMIT I REALLY WANT TO TOO!

/bSnare god/b: Call the cops. Peeta's at my door with a rolling pin. Please hurry. He just got in. No, no please don't

/bGale sucksb: Did Peeta just kill Gale?

/bSnare god/b: No he made me rye bread when I wanted whole wheat.

/bsave me from the knives/b: Then why do we have to call the cops?

/bSnare god/b: Because he won't give me a refund.

/bFire Jay/b: Gale you just are so… Unpleasant to talk to now.

/bBread man/b: I'm back. And yes I agree love. He is, how about we just leave and be alone.

/bFire Jay/b: What are you hinting at Peeta?

/bBread Man/b: You. Me. Bedroom. Now.

/bFire Jay/b: Fuck yeah!

/bSnare God/b: What, what no please don't.

/bSeveral minutes later/b

/bSnare god/b: *Sobbing uncontrollably*

/bBread man/b: What's up?

/bSnare god/b: WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY KATNISS?!

/bBread man/b: Oh I made an honest woman out of MY Katniss.

/bEveryone but Bread Man/b:-_-


	9. Chapter 9

Title: The day I got buttercup

Author: Gale sucks

Genre: Family

Rated: T

Summary: The day I got my handsome cat Buttercup.

It was one day when I was ten. I was milking my goat Lady when I hear a meow. I looked up and saw a little kitten. "Hey little buddy" I say. I walk over and pick him up. I stroke his head and purrs up a storm. I look at him. I see he has the fur color of a buttercup plant. "I think I'll name you Butter cup."

"Prim" Katniss called as she walked over.

"Katniss look" I say. I hold up the kitten. "Can we keep him?"

"I'm sorry Prim but no" she says.

"But, but he's just a kitten Katniss" I say "he can't fend for himself."

"He's just another mouth to feed" she says "plus look, he has worms."

"But he's so precious and he loves me" I say.

"No Prim" she says. She takes him from me. He purrs at her, not knowing what she's going to do.

"Please Katniss don't" I beg as tears fill my eyes. She walks over to a bucket that filled with rain water from last night. I panic. "No. No, no. No!" She dips his feet into the water. He hisses and pulls his feet up. She lowers him. "No please Katniss, please." She drops him in. He freaks out and tips over the bucket. He runs over to me. I take him into my arms. She sighs.

"Fine, fine. Keep it" she says. She walks off.

Mini Rebel: Aw Prim you have such a sweet spot for animals. Your heart is so kind. Two of the many reasons I love you.

Fire jay: Keep your distance kid.

That is mahogany: Katniss why would you do that to a little kitten? It's cruel and not very elegant to do.

Fire jay: *Gag* He would just be trouble. And he is.

Knives r everything: I may be a monster but I'd never do that. Katniss this is just cruel.

Mai sword: WHAT THE HELL KATNISS?! YOUR LITTLE SIS LOVED THAT THING AND YOU TRIED TO KILL IT! ARE YOU SOME MONSTER!

Save me from the knife: Katniss I may have killed a twelve year old but I'd never kill a kitten.

Song Rue: I'm going to ignore that and say Katniss you are no longer the most awesome person I know. Peeta just moved up.

Bread Man: Yay!

Fire jay: I will sooo break off this engagement.

Bread Man: But Katniss this is cruel, it's just a little kitten. You could call it a child. If our kid was another mouth to feed would you kill it?

Fire jay: No, no, no I wouldn't. What is abuse Katniss day?

I like your beard: Yes it is, I just made it a national holiday.

Axe girl2: Dude that's just cold, both of you.

Song Rue: Yeah that is pretty cruel Seneca. And Peeta just got bumped down. Katniss your back on top.

Fire jay: Finally someone who loves me today.

I like your beard: Rue, I can kill you, again.

Song Rue: Good luck. Where am I? Oh look I'm in a tree, now another and another. = P

I like your beard: Where'd you go? *Runs around all Panem* I can't find her, she's off the charts.

Fire jay: She can fly

I like your beard: What kind of mutt is she?

I will rock you: The awesome kind


	10. Chapter 10

Title: Why Katniss should pick me

Author: Snare God

Summary: Why Katniss should be mine and not Peeta's

Genre: Friendship and romance

Rated: T

Why Katniss should my lover and not Peeta's. First I have history with Katniss and I loved her longer. She knows deep down that she loves me more. (Suck it bread boy) When she kisses Peeta, she's thinking of me. And our kid would be the most epic hunter. And Katniss think, you don't want Prim dating Rory, we can stop that.

Fire jay: fdjkfdashjksdajksdafyjkfdjhsadlfajkkljfdasfajkld

Axe chick2: What the hell is that? Are you drunk?

Wine!: Haaaaaaaaaaa hhhhaaaaaaa ture

Snare God: Who gave him the computer, Prim you need to see someone about your bladder control.

Coal mining hunter guy: Don't you diss my kid. Plus Gale I know your dad, if he saw you, I think he might just laugh in your face. Cause you're so pitiful. And Gale I don't like you and Peeta, he's like the best kid for my Katniss.

Axe Chick2: I still want to know, Katniss are you drunk?

Fire jay: No I face computered

I set fire to the girl: What is that?

Fire jay: It's when you slam your face into the computer repeatedly

Bread Man: Uh Katniss did you take your pills today?

Snare god: WHAT PILLS?

Bread Man: The one that makes her less insane

Snare god: *sighs in relief. Then realizes he said pills.* What's the other one?!

Song Rue, Gale sucks and I set fire to the girl: WE KNOW!

Snare god: Tell me! Wait I don't want to know!

Rue song and Gale sucks: Birth control

Snare god: NNNOOOOO!

Bread Man: What you wanted us to do it unprotected.

Coal mining hunter guy: Well…At least they use protection -_-

Fire jay: Dad!

Coal mining hunter guy: But you're still in trouble.

Fire jay: Dad I'm like twenty you can't tell me what to do.

Coal mining hunter guy: Dammit! But Prim then you can't see that Rory kid.

Gale sucks: Two more years, I can wait.

Mini rebel: I love you Prim *blows a kiss*

Gale sucks: *Catches kiss* I love you too.

Fire jay: Maybe this bad timing to release the news I've been keeping in

Snare god: *Brings knife to wrist* Just say it

Fire jay: I was just saying I have a cold

Bread Man: Oh also I got some news.

Snare god: Oh god

Bread Man: What I got Katniss' cold

Coal mining hunter god: I hate you baker boy

Bread Man: It's bread man! *Puts cape on* bringing bread to poor people all around the world!

Fire jay: fkjhhfshjshjhjhjhjhjjhhjjadiysdhedyaoihoashaskdoaj sdh

I set fire to the girl: Another face computer

Fire jay: I'm marrying that -_- Now I know what Clove feels.

Knives r everything: So true

Mai sword and Bread Man: HEY!


	11. Chapter 11

Title: The trade

Author: Bread Man

Summary: A day at the bakery turns to hell.

Rated: T

I sit on the stool behind the counter. Rye walks over to me. "Hey Peeta" he says "if I could tell you I had some paint for you would you do me a favor?"

"Yeah" I say.

"Here it is then. For a full pallet of paint I dare you to pull down your pants in front of Katniss Everdeen when she comes to trade" he says.

"Hell no" I say "Rye I think that would just make my odds worse and they pretty much can't get any lower."

"Just do it" he says. I sigh.

"Fine" I say "just my pants, not under wear?"

"Yep" he says.

"I hate you" I say.

"Then why are you doing it. Plus she might just take one look and fall in love" he says. I glare at him. I walk to the back. I stand hidden to the side. I hear the bell ring. "Oh Katniss came for your trade." I walk out.

"Oh Peeta" Katniss says. I take a deep breath. I pull down my pants. Gale walks in.

"Oh bread boy, really" he says. He laughs. He grabs Katniss' hand and takes her out of the bakery.

"Dammit Rye I'm going to kill you" I say as I pull my pants up.

Fire jay: I remember that. I hoped you forgot.

Snare god: I had to pull her out because she was drooling over you

Bread Man: So she loved me then Gale =P

Fire jay: Uh…A little. It was awkward, Peeta you had in a hole in your under wear *blushes*

Knives r everything: Wow…Wasn't as pure as I thought.

Wine!: Sweetheart in moments of sobriety I would like to say, that I love you

Bread Man: Ha, ha not happening bro

Fire jay: Maybe this is really a bad time to tell you all…Including you Peeta.

Everlark 4 ever: OMG, OMG, OMG!

Snare god: NO, NO, NO!

Fire jay: You guessed it, I'm pregnant.

Snare god, Coal mining hunter guy, tell me a secret: NNNNOOOOOO!

Fluffy fishy: Why do you care Finnick?

Tell me a secret: Uh, oh is that Johanna calling me?

Axe chick2: I'm right here brainless

Tell me a secret: Shhhhhhhhhh

Fluffy fishy: What are your secrets?

Tell me a secret: That's my thing

Fire jay: Spill it Odair

Bread Man: He has rebound!

Knives r everything: Wow that's your reaction to your fiancée being pregnant?

Bread Man: No, this is. OHH MY GOD! A BABY! I love you Katniss Everdeen! *Runs from computer*

Fire jay: Where'd he-

(Outside of the computer)

"I love you Katniss Mellark" Peeta says to Katniss as he takes her into his arms. He kisses her passionately. She pulls away

"What want to go for two?" she asks. He laughs. "You know my dad is going to kill you."

"Worth it" he says. "They just don't know that we're not fiancées anymore."

(Back to computer)

Snare god: I think I died inside

Gale sucks: Well guess that means no you and her.

Snare god: Shut up, I can be a step dad

Coal mining hunter guy: Where is Peeta so I can kill him

Fire jay: RUN PEETA RUN!

Bread Man: No Katniss I will do this, for the child.

Coal mining hunter guy: You're not married

Fire jay: Um funny story

Coal mining hunter guy: I wanted to walk you down the aisle. You're grounded

Fire jay: I don't think you have that right anymore

Foxface: He doesn't

Knives r everything: *Gasp* It speaks

Foxface: What do I do? Meow?

Wine!: I thought you barked since you're a fox

Foxface: Meow, meow, meow

Wine!: *Gasps* how dare you?!

Fire jay: What did she say?

Wine!: I'd rather not tell

Snare god: I'm going to die alone

Bread Man: I could set you up with the second best girl in the world. After my Katniss. Delly.

Everlark 4 Eva: Second best? In your eyes maybe, sorry Katniss.

Snare god: Delly would you go out with me if I asked?

Everlark 4 Eva: Sure

Snare god: It's a date :]

A/N: Reviews give me inspiration for other chapters so write away please :P Thanks you guys are awesome.


	12. Chapter 12

Title: The future

Author: Gale sucks

Summary: What we expect for the future.

Rated: T (just in case)

"Rory" I say.

"Yes love?" Rory asks.

"What do you see this going?" I ask.

"I think here" he says. "Will you marry me Prim?"

"Yes!" I shout

Many words later…

I watch Rory chase after little Abigail and her cousin. "Never thought I'd see this Kat" I say to Katniss.

"What Rory playing with your child?" she asks

"No him playing with yours" I say. She smiles at the ground.

"Yeah" she says "never thought I'd have kids either." Abigail runs over and tackles me.

"Keep me away from the dandelion monster" she says as she clutches to me. Rory runs over, he's covered in dandelions. "Shoot it aunt Katniss! Shoot it!" Katniss tosses a pebble at Rory, he falls to the ground. "Yay!"

Fire jay: Wow…That's kind of cute.

Mini Rebel: Aw, I love you Prim

Coal mining hunter guy: How many fools will I kill today, do I have to count? Don't get in my way. Here we go, killing my foes with the flick of the bow.

Bread Man: OMG! Assassin's creed!

Mini rebel: Should I run Peeta?  
Gale sucks: No, I'll save you! Healing girl away! *Grabs cape and floats off*

Fire jay: I'll help ya sis! Squirrel girl off! *Grabs cape and runs after Prim* Speed up Prim!  
Bread Man: Don't cha forget me! Bread Man will help you ladies! *Grabs mask and cap and runs off*

Mai sword: Are you like high?

Song Rue: Nope, let me join you! Tree girl hop off! *Grabs Seneca's cloak and uses it as a cape and runs off into the trees*

That is mahogany: Rue you shouldn't steal Seneca's clothes. It's not nice and he's nude now

I like your beard: NOOO! The beard down south is showing! *Runs away crying*

Knives r everything: What just happened and whatever the crazy four are on I'll take two!

Fire jay: We're on awesomeness!

Song Rue: Actually I found this weird pill in Prim's pocket and god they work wonders. I had twenty

Gale sucks: That was Katniss' calmers! I got her special ones for pregnant woman! Rue too much makes crazy worse!

Fluffy fishy: That explains THE SHARK THEORY a lot.

Tell me a secret: May I have a pill to give to Annie?

Axe chick2: What's the shark theory? And ah Finnick your wet.

Tell me a secret: Sorry I took a swim, oh you're afraid of water still? Bring it in kid

Axe chick2: NOO!

Bread Man: I'll save you! *Tackles Finnick and towels him dry*

Tell me a secret: Damn you Bread Man!

Bread Man: I'm awesome! *Prances around like a butterfly*

Snare god: Peeta you dabble in the rainbow arts?

Bread Man: *Stops dancing* No I just, Katniss taught me how to dance! *Points accusingly*

Sparkles from beyond: Cato? I eat boys up, breakfast and lunch, then when I'm thirsty I drink their blood.

Mai sword: *Walks over to her and puts lips to neck*

Knives r everything: Are you kissing her neck?!

Mai sword: No I was sucking her blood

Fire jay: What is this twilight?

Foxface: You read those book?

Fire jay: NO! Peeta made me watch the movies with him

Bread Man: And you loved them, admit it Katniss.

Knives r everything: Our story is better

I will rock you: Yep. Rue why did you read those books to me?

Song Rue: Prim made me read them so I made you

Gale sucks: True and true.

Song Rue: You compare Katniss to Bella, Katniss a girl that fought in a televised fight to the death and saved her sis. And Bella a girl that had to be saved by a damn sparkly guy who wore too much hair gel. And the love triangles Katniss has a hunter guy and a baker, and Bella has a werewolf and a vampire! The only thing that is similar is that the one she picks she just met and the one she didn't was her friend!

Fire jay: This is going to get SOO much hate with the twilight fans on this site

Song Rue: I know but it had to be said.


	13. Chapter 13

Title: The first date

Author: Snare god

Summary: Delly and I's first date.

Rated: T

I walk to Delly's door. I nervously knock on the door, it makes it sound like I'm pissed when I'm kind of happy. She opens the door. "Ready?" she asks. I hold out a bouquet.

"I brought you some flowers" I say. "Peeta said you liked calla lilies."

"Yeah" she says "and you got them in my favorite color."

"Yeah purple" I say. We walk off.

"You know I never thought I'd be going on a date with you Gale" she says.

"Who'd you think would?" I ask

"No one, just I had a boyfriend, but we were just too close as friends for it to work" she says.

"Who was it?" I ask

"Peeta" she says drily "I asked him out and he broke it off. Well we both did, we agreed we liked it better when we were friends. You know you think you love them, well you do, just not that way. Really you think you do but it's a love like how you love your sibling." I look down. I guess she's right.

"You're right" I say as I smile. "You know I think we just might have the best night now."

Later…

"I had fun" I say as we get to her door.

"Yeah me too" she says. "Maybe we can do this another time."

"I'll call you or…PM you one fan fiction" I say.

"Kay" she says. She kisses me on the cheek and walks inside.

Fire jay: Glad you had fun Gale

Bread Man: If you break her heart I swear to god I'm going to kill you

Mai sword: Hey guys, we all have girls now. I've always wanted to do this, come on boys sing along. Sugar, sugar.

Bread Man: Ohh, ohh. She sits along, waiting for suggestions. He so nervous avoiding all her questions

Snare god: His lips are dry, her heart is slowly pounding. Don't you just know exactly what their thinking?

Mini rebel: if you want my body and you think I'm sexy come on sugar tell me so, if you really need me just reach out and touch me come on honey let tell me so.

Wine!: Tell me so baby

Bread Man: His acting shy, looking for an answer aw come on honey let's spend the night together. Give me a time, so I can phone my mother.

Tell me a secret: They catch a cab to a hise rise apartment. At last he can tell her exactly what his heart meant.

All: Oh if you want my body and ya think I'm sexy come on sugar tell me so, if you really need me just reach out and touch me come on honey tell me so. Oh if you want my body.

Fire jay: How'd we get to the guys singing a sexy song?

Everlark 4 Eva: Gale, last night well was pretty awesome. But you said it wrong, I didn't kiss his cheek, I kissed his lips

Fire jay: Cool. Yay Gale's got a girlfriend. Can't wait to tell Hazel.

Axe chick2: Who's Haymitch's lover?

That is mahogany: I'm right here, I love you Mitchy

Wine!: We haven't said that yet…

That is mahogany: I just did

Fire jay: I think you gotta say three words Haymitch

Wine!: IFKJFD DFPF SFDJ 'PFDOI FOIU FPOAIUSDFI

Fire jay: He's drunk sorry Effie

Wine!: No Prim's cat jumped on my keyboard. Prim he's drunk now

Gale sucks: NOOOO! He was three months sober!

Coal mining hunter guy: Prim I read your story, your grounded for two years.

Gale sucks: Shit, shit, shit.

Mini rebel: FUUUUUU

Coal mining hunter guy: Do you want approval for marriage you'll shut our mouth.

Mini rebel: -_-

Everyone: You just got towed!


	14. Chapter 14

Title: The adventures of Bread Man

Author: Bread Man

Summary: The adventures of the awesome hero, Bread Man.

Rated: T

Bakery by day, superhero by night, Bread Man! With his sidekick Squirrel girl! Protects children from the games and feeds the hungry. First story.

I sit behind the counter in my bakery. When my phone rings. I answer. "Hello" I say.

"Bread Man this is President Paylor. We need you to save twenty two children from the evil Snow" Paylor says.

"I'm on it" I say. I hang up. I press a button under the counter.

Many awesome pages later….

"You may've won this time but I'll be back" Snow shouts. He sinks into the floor.

"Thank you Bread Man" Rue the twelve year old from eleven says.

"All in a day's work" I say. "Bread Man away." I run off into the night

Fire jay: Did you have an attack Peeta?

Bread Man: An attack of awesomeness!

Song Rue: Dafuq!

Bread Man: You like the story no?

Mai sword: You're retarded

Snare god: Good luck Katniss, he's blown a gasket

Everlark 4 Eva: That's exactly what I thought!

Snare god: We're so perfect together, I love you Delly

Fire jay: What would that ship be?

Bread Man: Gally

Mai sword: Better than Peeniss

Bread Man and Fire jay: SHUT UP!

Sparkles form beyond the beyond: I'm back

Knives r everything and Mai sword: DAMMIT I THOUGHT I KILLED YOU!

Song Rue: Will you ever officially die?!

Sparkles from beyond the beyond: Nope. Hehehe. So Peeta-

Fire jay: Don't even think it bitch

Sparkles from beyond the beyond: Ya wanna go out?

Bread Man: Nope. Bread Man away! Squirrel girl le' go!

Fire jay: Peeta no just no

Bread Man: But-

Song Rue: Bro just give up

Bread Man: I'm going somewhere I'm wanted

Sparkles from beyond the beyond: You could come over my house

Bread Man: Cato wanna kill her again?

Mai sword: Fuck yea! *Grabs sword* Let's go Peeta!

Bread Man: *Grabs rolling pin* Sweet!

Mai sword and Bread Man: *Beats Glimmer to death*

Sparkles from beyond the beyond: I will never die!

Coal mining hunter guy: Here's an idea. Kill her and burn the pieces!  
Fire jay: Here we go with Twilight again. Dad you read those too?

Coal mining hunter guy: Uh…No

Knives r everything: I saw you at book club when we read it

Coal mining hunter guy: You shut up and I'll make you the best set of knives you've ever seen

Knives r everything: *Shuts up for all eternity*

Mai sword: This'll never get old =D

Fire jay: Give it time kid, give it time.


	15. Chapter 15

Title: Random stuff about me

Author: Foxface

Summary: This is just some random things I think people wondered about

Rated: K

My name is Lily

I knew that it was nightlock I just knew I couldn't win against a career and the star-crossed lovers.

My story is well I'm the daughter of the supervisor at the power plant. Who snuck around the fence and watched the animals eating to find out what I could eat and what would kill me. I never talked because no one would talk to me.

Nightlock is sour and very delicious actually. It's a fast painless way. So I was happy to go out like that.

I will rock you: I wanted to talk to you.

Fire jay: Oh…Wow that's why…I knew you were too smart to not know what it was

Bread Man: Again sorry for the nightlock

Gale sucks: I always liked Foxface

Foxface: Really

Knives r everything: Katniss where is your dad with my knives?

Fire jay: *Shrugs*

Coal mining hunter guy: Right here *Hands knives to Clove*  
Knives r everything: OMG!

Mai sword: Can you make me a sword?

Coal mining hunter guy: You have to grow one yourself kid

Snare god: Lol

Sparkles from beyond the beyond the beyond: Uh may I speak?

Mai sword: *Sighs* We can't kill you so fine

Sparkles form beyond the beyond the beyond: I kissed Peeta!

Fire jay: WHAT?!  
Bread Man: I didn't kiss back, I swear on my bread.

Fire jay: GLIMMER YOU WILL DIE, I WILLL FIND A DAMN WAY!

Knives r everything: I WILL HELP YOU!

Mai sword: ME TOO!

Song Rue: LET'S ALL KILL GLIMMER!

Save me from the knife: Be gentle with her.

Song Rue: Where'd she go?

Fire jay: Dammit she's gone! I will you find you bitch!

Bread Man: Katniss. Calm down.

Fire jay: SHUT UP OR I'LL KICK YOU IN BALLS!

Bread Man: No not my pastries! *Runs away crying*

Gale sucks: Katniss you made your husband cry

Fire jay: What?

Everyone: *sighs*

Chapter 16 (I thought that other one was kind of bad and it was kinda short so here is second chapter for ya'll)

Title: How am I close to Rue?

Author: I will rock you

Summary: How Rue is close to me

Rated: K

How do I know little Rue? Well it's simple. She's my cousin. Well more like a little sister to me. If anyone hurt her in the district, I hurt them. I thought Clove killed Rue so I killed her because if you mess with my little mountain flower I WILL ROCK YOU! I did it in the district. I didn't kill them but I'd pelt them with rocks or break an arm or leg. One of them I made eat a rock.

Song Rue: Oh Thresh you're always there for me *kisses his cheek*

Fire jay: Wow…

I will rock you: She's the only reason you're breathing

Bread Man: No…That's me

Fire jay: No…It's my bow

Song Rue: Actually, it is me (the nest)

Mai sword, Knives r everything and save me from the knife: Yep those tracker jackers hurt like the dickens.

I like your beard: I hate Rue I want to kill her so much! She stole my cloak! My mommy made it!

Fire jay: Mommy?

I will rock you: Don't hurt Rue! *Beats Seneca with a boulder*

I like your beard: OW STOP IT! PLEASE YOU'RE GETTING BLOOD ON MY BEARD! *dies*

I will rock you: Anyone want to hurt MY Rue? *Holds up boulder*

Everyone but Song Rue: We're good!

I will rock you: What I thought


	16. Chapter 16

Title: Adventures of Bread Man 2

Author: Bread Man

Summary: Bread man is on yet another adventure

Rated: T

I sit down at the counter reading a paper. The headline reads 'Bread Man saves the day again.' I smirk.

"What's got you in a good mood?" Katniss asks

"Oh nothing" I say.

"Oh really…Bread Man" she says.

"Shh Katniss" I say.

"Peeta its fine" she says.

"No it's-"I say. The lights go out and I'm knocked out cold.

I wake up. I feel my hands restrained.

"Thank you Katniss" I say sarcastically. Snow walks out of the shadows. I almost pass out at the scent of the roses and blood under his breath.

"Yes I thank Ms. Everdeen" he says in a purr. "Well but that thanks only got her safe for so long."

"You hurt her I swear-"I say.

"Hurt her? Why who would want to do that?" he asks almost sounding innocent.

"Where is she?" I ask as I pull on the chains. He smiles.

"Want to play a game Peeta?" he asks.

"Nope I'm good. But may I leave with my wife?" I say.

"If you win you may if I win…You both die" he says. "You don't play you don't even have the chance to win." I sigh.

"Fine what is the damn game?" I ask. He clicks a button. I fall to the ground. I grip my wrists. He clicks another button.

Many pages and button pushing later…

"Stop" I beg. He throws a key.

"You have ten minutes to find her and get out" he says. He rises out of the building. He pushes on last button. I run out. I run down a hall.

"Katniss!" I shout.

TO BE CONTIUED

Fire jay: I have no comment Peeta…Wait did I screw you over in this story?

Bread Man: No ;)

Fire jay: Did you just wink?

Bread Man: Absolutely not ;)

Fire jay: Stop it or I cut off the wifi

Knives r everything: Wow…I liked it better when you were writing about mooning Katniss.

Mai sword: I'm still waiting about why Peeta will never eat cinnamon buns

Fire jay: Peeta this sucked. I will never be squirrel girl

Bread Man: Hey I made you all cupcakes

Everyone: *takes cupcake*

Fire jay: You know Squirrel girls one weakness. Sweets.

Knives r everything: Knife woman!

I will rock you: The rock!

Bread Man: Bread Man!

Axe chick2: Axe chick!

Song Rue: Tree girl!

Gale sucks: Apothecary girl! Also I'm changing my name! Doesn't my hatred burns less! I'm changing to Rory's lover!

Mini rebel: The rebel!

Fire jay: I'm the rebel! Wait what Prim?!

Rory's lover: XD you got something to say about that because look what I got *holds up bow* Hahahaha

Guest: You are-…Forget it techno man!

Fluffy fishy: The SHIRTLESS PEETA!

Bread Man: -_- that's it? That's your name?

Fluffy fishy: Yeah.

Fire jay: I don't think I'm comfortable with that.

Fluffy fishy: oh darn…I'm psycho chick not SHRITLESS PEETA!

Foxface: The fox!

Song Rue: Tree girl!

Mai sword: Sword guy!

I like your beard: I'm the villain! The beard!

That is mahogany: me too! The manners!

I set fire to the girl: I'm good! Human burner!  
Fire jay: that doesn't sound like a good guy.

Everlark 4 Eva: Shipper girl!

Snare god: Snare guy! I will ensnare in my love Delly!

Everlark 4 Eva: *blushes*

Save me from the knife: the diamond thrower!

Immortal Sparkles: I'm a villain! Devil's shine!

Tell me a secret: The bird savior!

Wine!: I'm a villain! A sober villain at the time! The drunk!

Fire jay: Wait Peeta what are in these cupcakes?

Bread Man: Oh just the basics and a little of those pills.

Fluffy fishy: I didn't take on.

Fire jay: this is like that time we…

Fluffy fishy: yeah then we…

Fire jay: yeah

Bread Man and tell me a secret: What was it?!

Fire jay: We…Then we…

Fluffy fishy: yeah then we did that….

Fire jay: yeah

Mau sword: FML!

A/N: Hey! =) I hope you enjoyed. You like Preeta? What is that you ask? It's a Prim and Peeta ship. We've been working on a FanFiction called Prim loves Peeta. It'll be up soon. Please check it out. Love you guys. *virtual hug* also WE SHIP PREETA ALL THE WAY! You might too after you read it. It'll be up in a day or two. Kay bye.


	17. Chapter 17

Title: The fangirl escape

Author: Tell me a secret

Rated: T

Summary: one swim gone horribly wrong.

I run into the water and start to do back strokes. I look up to see Peeta still sitting on the shore drawing. "Hey, aren't you going to learn?" I ask.

"No, I'm good" he says.

"You promised" I say.

"Fine" he says. He takes off his shirt and walks in. He paddles over. I smile. "Do you hear something?"

"Hmm?" I say. I hear screams and loud footsteps. "Fangirls!" We run out. It's a dash to grab our stuff. We slip our clothes on as we go. "Run Mellark!"

"I am!" he shouts. "I dropped my book!"  
"Leave it!" I shout. "Where's a trident when you need one?!" He trips. "Peeta!"  
"Go on without me!" he shouts. "Tell Katniss I love her!" He's pulled in by a bunch of girls. I hear his screams. They still pursue. "Run Finnick! They have claws! Ah no, not the pants!" I run harder. I get to the house. I open the door and slam it. "Help me!" He's thrown onto the ground. I open the door. His clothes are torn and he's covered in lipstick. I pull him in. He cowards in the corner in a ball. "The girls and the tearing and the Everlark. I need therapy Finnick. Call me a doctor." I kneel down.

"It's okay man" I say. I see Cato and Marvel run past the house.

"Open the damn door!" Cato shouts. I let him in. "We need like a million restraining orders."

"And a therapist" I say.

"It's too late, we've lost him" Marvel says "those fangirls have taken his soul."

"What have those women done to him?" I ask

"I need, a hospital" Peeta says "or at least some painkillers?"  
"Where did they touch you?" Marvel asks.

"Everywhere" Peeta says.

"I'll call Johanna" I say.

"No, no women" Cato says "he's having bro night withdrawal."

Fire jay: 0.0

Bread Man: That's why I'm still in therapy

Fire jay: Well…that's enough for today

Fluffy fishy: Where did the EXPLODING BABYSEALS fangirls touch you?

Bread Man: I told you, everywhere

Rory's lover: Uh…did Gale ever get chased

Tell me a secret: sadly…he didn't make it

Mai Sword: A moment of silence for him

Axe girl1: Why would you call me?

Tell me a secret: You're the biggest dude chick of our group. He needed a woman's touch and a bro's support.

Fire Jay: This is why I don't like it when I let you guys go to Finnick's house

Save me from the knife: I think one of the fangirls was D-

Everlark 4 Eva: Heh, shut up

Fire Jay: Delly

Everlark 4 Eva: OMG Katniss I forgot to ask, boy or a girl?

Fire Jay: Delly

Everlark 4 Eva: I never touched him. How you doin' fish boy? *winks*

Snare God: Uh, is this normal?

Everlark 4 Eva: Dammit, Glimmer. Stop using my laptop

Immortal Sparkles: *Giggles*

Tell me a secret: I'm doing just fine. F.J. learned to swim this week.

Fire Jay: I NEED HELP! PEETA IS COWARDING IN THE CORNER! HE WENT TO THE BAKERY AND HE GOT ATTACKED! *cries* He's rocking back and forth.

Tell me a secret: NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOO! THAT'S OUR CALL MEN!

Mai Sword: Katniss, get the hell out of there. Don't talk to him, don't touch him, just go!

Bread Man: Where are my bros? *wipes lipstick from chest* I need the therapist again

Save me from the knife: I have him on speed dial

Writer 1: Where did they touch you?  
Fire Jay: WHO ARE YOU?!

Writer 2: Your worst nightmare. Kidding. *laughs* we are your creators

Song Rue: Your Susann Collins?

Writer 1: We wish! No we're fangirls.

Bread Man: shut up!  
Writer 2: Not those fangirls, the ones who put you in our twisted little stories. You are our little pawns.

Fire Jay: *grabs bow* where are you?!  
Writer 1: *types and hits enter*

Fire Jay: My bow's a hair bow.

Writer 2: Yep, we can control you.

Bread Man: 0.0 . :O

Writer 1: Well written ;) How are you today?

Bread Man: Too soon

Writer 2: *Pushes up glasses* I am your therapist, tell me your problems

Bread Man: They were everywhere. Touching me, grabbing me, tearing my clothes, kissing me. It was horrible.

Writer 1: *Hands you tissue box* Uh-huh, how does that make you feel?

Bread Man: *lies down on sofa* Scared, scarred, sad, violated

Writer 2: Have you lost sleep over this?

Bread Man: Sometimes, yeah

Writer 1: I recommend a good sized bottle of mace and some running shoes.

Writer 2: Have a nice day Mr. Mellark =D

Everyone: What just happened?

A/N: Oh crap, we need a new forth wall, CAUSE WE JUST BROKE IT! Hehe, yeah this might be suckish but thought it would be funny so…you don't like it, tell us, but you like it. Poor Bread man will get his needed therapy. Also comment with a '=]' if you'd be in that fangirl attack.


End file.
